Category: Kaiju Heroes

Name: American BeetleType: Boxing-skill electoral heroHeight: 629 ballotsWeight: 6 tons (easily inflatable)Attack: Running for second term; presidential pounce, one arm back stabWin/Lose/Draw: 63/32/3Allies: Silver Potato, Sentai Jin, Slo FengEnemies: Uchu Chu, Atomic Cannon, Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle In the realm of live monster wrestling, American Beetle once held the distinction of being the smarmiest character to…

Name: Burger BearType: Kaiju HeroHeight: 5000 Onion RingsWeight: 743.7 million Big Macs.Attack: Burger SplashWin/Lose/Draw: 48/20/0Allies: Bear Ranger, Unicorn PartyEnemies: Dr. Cube, Bear Ranger In the picturesque mountains of Greece where ancient legends still lingered in the air, a young girl named Daphne was an animal trainer at a small circus owned by her father. One…

Name: Dusto BunnyType: Unclean home result heroHeight: One billion dust mitesWeight: 64 tons (mostly fluff)Attack: Bunny stomp, lucky foot kick, jack rabbit hammer punchIQ: Einstein, but better at mathWin/Lose/Draw: 52/39/2Allies: Silver Potato, Los Plantanos, Atomic CannonEnemies: No enemies, but susceptible to Swiffer™ mops. Schoolgirls make enormous screaming. Furious Fuzzy Terror. Many times ago, discovery by…

Name: French ToastType: E.U. breakfast HeroHeight: One Eiffel TowerWeight: Two thousand tons of rageAttack: Waffle SlamWin/Lose/Draw: 10/18/1Allies: ???Enemies: American Beetle, Steam-Powered Tentacle Boulder Gaston Bourzat was born in Grenoble, France, in 1920 to poor shoe makers, Amélie and Jean-Pierre Bourzat. Jean-Pierre died when Gaston was a child, and Amélie was chemically poisoned in a photo-booth accident while Gaston was a teen. By early…

Name: Good DeranoType: Kaiju Hero?Height: TBAWeight: TBAAttack: TBAWin/Lose/Draw: 1/0/0Allies: TBAEnemies: TBA Derano was once a duck, a normal duck doing normal duck things. In the rainy depths of the Pacific Northwest, he led a seemingly tranquil life, quacking his way through the serene lakes and rivers. Little did he suspect that his ordinary existence was on the brink of a surreal transformation. In…

Name: JapandroidType: TBAHeight: TBAWeight: TBAAttack: TBAWin/Lose/Draw: 8/6/0Allies: Unicorn PartyEnemies: Dr. Cube, Hell Monkey

Name: Kung-Fu Chicken NoodleType: Unfriendliest rogue consommeHeight: 100 metersWeight: 120 fluid tonsAttack: Kickin’ noodle stance, chicken bone choke, steam rollerMSG Count: 40%Tag Line: Mmm Mmm Bad!Win/Lose/Draw: 55/18/0Allies: NoneEnemies: All humans, All Kaiju, Everyone In Y2K crisis, maximum production levels forcing Cantonese worker at having special bowl of chicken soup cooking on stove. Because not fresh,…

Name: Paco PlantainType: El Grande Gusto heroHeight: 60 metersWeight: 500 CentavosAttack: Cuban clothesline, the plantain roll, the double hurricaneRevolutions per Minute: 960Coup Factor: 0.397Win/Lose/Draw: 27/14/1Allies: Dusto Bunny, Powa RanjuruEnemies: Dr. Cube El order social es un pequeno burgo drogas celebracion. Burros por todos manuel trabajos. Los lobos grande gusto revolution! El Sock Puppet Dictator son las meurto en el dia con mucho sangria! Los…

Name: Pedro PlantainType: El Grande Gusto heroHeight: 60 metersWeight: 500 CentavosAttack: Cuban clothesline, the plantain roll, the double hurricaneRevolutions per Minute: 960Coup Factor: 0.397Win/Lose/Draw: 38/19/0Allies: Club Sandwich, Dusto Bunny, Powa RanjuruEnemies: Dr. Cube, Mung Wun, Beefy L’Ox El order social es un pequeno burgo drogas celebracion. Burros por todos manuel trabajos. Los lobos grande gusto revolution! El Sock Puppet Dictator son las meurto en…

Name: Powa RanjuruType: Angelic super heroine typeHeight: Variable vinyl type omega leap sneakersWeight: Junior bantam wieghtAge: 17Style: Timely fashionAttack: “Mallet Protector” beat down, air jordan face plant, little brother squish, ultra-pain back handWin/Lose/Draw: 31/8/1Allies: Atomic Trooper, Silver Potato, Dusto BunnyEnemies: Sky Deviler, Kung-Fu Chicken Noodle, Dr. Cube In the quaint Chinatown of Tokyo, nestled beneath…